Transvac Discard Skilled Staff But Retain Imbeciles - Ted Maul Reports

Transvac Systems, a tin-pot tuppenny ha'penny firm based near Ford prison has released its two most skilled employees in a recent staff shake-up. However, a whiff of controversy surrounds their release by the fact that Transvac have retained some members of staff who, as it has been observed, are as much use as the chernobyl safety manager. The highly skilled and experienced men cannot be named for legal reasons. Howard Bland, 50, a time served pipe fitter and system trouble-shooter of anglo-scandinavian descent and David Whines, 47, an electro-mechanical marine engineer of anglo-scottish descent are now coming to terms with the current employment environment whilst at least 2 halfwits retain their positions earning film star wages. Mr Bland is reported to have already been head-hunted by a rival company but will be relaxing on a beach somewhere surrounded by women until he returns to work. Mr Whines is considering his options but in the meantime will spend time in his recording studio and preparing lectures for a local amateur gynecology group. It is a sad reflection of todays world when hands on skills are no longer required and two men at the top of their profession find themselves on the scrapheap facing an uncertain furure.