Sausage Night Etiquette Breach Controversy - Ted Maul Reports

Inglenook regulars, staff and Monday night sausage club members are still reeling over the events of February the 18th, an evening set to become folklore. It started as any sausage club night with various members criticising not only the cooking methods but the sausage casing quality and ingredients thereof.  This casual banter was, however, interrupted when Neil Mellers entered the establishment after witnessing a typical Chelsea defeat at the Bear, an inferior pub a short distance away. Mr Mellers, 56, of Anglo Maltese descent seemed to be in an advanced stage of refreshment and after two pints of London Pride had the temerity to take an uncut sausage from the grill and place the entire snorker into his mouth. A savage berating then began but Mr Mellers seemed oblivious to this unparalleled act of sheer folly. Casual observers sat open mouthed offering gasps of sheer disbelief. Whether Mr Mellers will be welcomed back at another juncture is yet to be decided.


 Mr Neil Mellers

"Wakey Wakey Son!" 

 

First Published 2021

 

 

Comments

Lord David said…
Comment from Neil Mellers
"No, no, no Ted, youve got it wrong yet again.
I am not asleep in this photo.
After putting the whole snorker in my mouth in one go, I am positioning my head forward so it will slide whole, down my gullet in one go like a torpedo down a well oiled tube.
Obviously, this requires intense concentration, hence my eyes being closed."
10:07 pm
Lord David said…
I will inform Ted Maul ASAP...
10:08 pm
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